Coming home: reverse culture shock

November, and Mushfiq, 31, has been home three months after a master’s and two years of work in London. His Ammu has framed the graduation photo for the drawing room in Dhanmondi. At every dawat his Khala asks, “London e beef bhuna pawa jay?” and then, “So, now biye?” He has been introduced to two “very good families” and taken to see a flat in Bashundhara he cannot afford.

He has started at a bank in Motijheel. The CNG to work takes an hour; in London he cycled along the canal. His old friends meet for adda at the same tea stall by Rabindra Sarobar, and he cannot explain why he goes quiet. “Bhai, you’ve become such a sahib,” says Anis, grinning. “Next you’ll ask for oat milk in the cha.” Mushfiq laughs. At night he scrolls photos of his London flatmates, then job pages for Toronto, then lies awake, guilty for missing a place his parents never saw, in the city he spent years missing.

An illustration drawn from common experience. The person is invented; the pattern is not.

Understanding reverse culture shock

Reverse culture shock, also called re-entry stress, is the difficulty of re-adjusting to home after living abroad. Home has changed, and so has the person: new habits, values and freedoms that do not fit easily back in, and family and friends who expect the old self. It is not a diagnosis. When the distress is stronger than expected and affects work or relationships, a doctor may consider an adjustment disorder, and if low mood, loss of interest, and changes in sleep and appetite persist, depression. In an 18-month study of 1,485 secondary school students from 45 countries who spent most of a year abroad, those returning to more collectivist and culturally uniform home countries had more re-entry stress. Accepting the situation was linked with less stress, and avoiding it with more. An interview study of Algerian students returning home from the United Kingdom described reverse culture shock, uncertainty about how to talk about distress, and stigma that made seeking help harder.

Signs worth noticing

• Feeling like a stranger at home, irritated by things that never used to bother you
• Missing the life abroad, and feeling guilty about missing it
• Withdrawing from friends and family gatherings
• Constant comparison between there and here, and planning to leave again
• Low mood, poor sleep or loss of interest that lasts for weeks

How care helps

Often what helps first is talking: naming the loss as real, and finding a way to combine both selves rather than choose between them. Research on high-school students returning after most of a year abroad found acceptance-based coping linked with lower re-entry stress, and avoidance with higher. Talking therapy can help a person grieve what was left behind, renegotiate family expectations about work and biye, and build a life that fits who they are now. If depression or anxiety have developed, they are treated with the therapies, and where appropriate the medicines, that guidelines recommend. A psychiatrist will also ask about sleep, alcohol, and any thoughts of self-harm.

What getting better can look like

Mushfiq might start with a second-hand bicycle and the early roads around Dhanmondi Lake before the traffic, a Friday adda where he tells Anis what he actually misses, and a talk with Ammu about biye that ends, for now, with her laughing.

Common questions about reverse culture shock

Is reverse culture shock real?

Yes. People who return home after study or work abroad often describe feeling out of place, missing their life overseas, and finding home changed. Research on high-school students returning after most of a year abroad found more re-entry stress among those going back to more collectivist cultures, and less stress among those who accepted the experience rather than avoided it.

How long does reverse culture shock last?

There is no fixed time, and it varies from person to person. If low mood, poor sleep or withdrawal last more than a few weeks, or make work and relationships hard, it is worth talking to a doctor, because an adjustment disorder or depression can be treated.

When to see a psychiatrist

If you have come home and the heaviness is not lifting, or you are drinking more, withdrawing, or thinking life is not worth living, please talk to someone. In an emergency, call 999.

Care here is personal: built around your history, your health and what you want to change, and reviewed with you as it goes.

Sources

• Černigoj et al., Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 2025 (PMID 41321205)
• Boussaoui et al., International Journal of Qualitative Studies on Health and Well-being, 2026 (PMID 42647401)